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The funny money
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Posted: 12/11/2009 - 06:20 PM
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The key to understanding why we Belizeans can’t stop our politicians from robbing us, and laughing at us, is the funny money – drug money and offshore money. Those of us Belizeans who work for an honest living will never be able to discipline the political predators until we ourselves become so disciplined that we can reject the funny money, walk away from it. That is very difficult to do, easier said than done, because the funny money is all around us, and it comes by the plenty. The hypocrites in high places swim in it. We ordinary people often end up yielding to temptation because we think everybody’s doing it, and we worry that we’ll get left by the wayside. Everybody else seems to be having fun.
         
To understand our dilemma, you have to examine the nature and modus operandi of Belize’s dominant political parties – the UDP and the PUP. These are the largest, best organized, and best financed groups of people in the country who have no laws to govern them. Even the Mafia is sometimes tripped up by laws. In Belize, no politician has ever gone to jail. They have been, effectively, above the law.
         
Each of the major political parties has two treasuries. One is the official party treasury, which is always broke, and the other is the unofficial and real party treasury, into which the funny money is deposited. Apart from the drug and offshore money, that funny money includes campaign donations which can be considered outright bribes. By that we mean that the party official who accepts such donations, makes firm promises to the donor with respect to the gifts which the donor will receive once the party comes to power. Very few people in the party will know about these bribes and promises. That is why that money is also funny.
         
At the highest levels of the PUDP, the money flows freely, and that is why officials in the two parties are always fighting to gain higher posts. At the base of the pyramid, the money is small, and moves slowly. That is the official party treasury. At the apex of the pyramid, where the big boys keep “balls in the air,” the money is plentiful. It is funny money. That is the real treasury.
         
In the first twenty years of party politics in Belize, there was little funny money in our political campaigns. Things began to change in the 1970’s, when the UDP started to take money from questionable business sources in the United States. We are not George Price fans at this newspaper, because he passes himself off as a saint, and we know for sure that he is not. But up until 1979, Mr. Price’s PUP was not owned by the funny money. That, of course, changed in the following decade.
         
Check out this game which the lawyer/politicians play in Belize. When the PUP is in power, the ranking drug traffickers in Belize are defended by the highest ranking politicians in the UDP. When the UDP is in power, the ranking drug traffickers are defended by the highest ranking politicians in the PUP. Do you really believe the relationship of affinity between politician/attorney and drug trafficking/client ceases absolutely once the case is finished? These cases have been the “thin edge of the wedge” where the penetration of drug money into Belizean politics is concerned.
         
The funny money donors represent a link, a common denominator, between the UDP and the PUP leaderships. Funny money donors are giving money to both leaderships, and they all, funny money donors and political leaders, casually drink Blue Label together on the social occasions/holidays which abound in little Belize. By now the camaraderie amongst all and sundry at the top has reached the point where it’s like one big, happy family – funny money donors and PUDP. It’s a real lovefest.
         
So then, every now and then one of these political leaders in power gets greedy. You know how it is. They have plenty, but they can’t have enough. (The saint always gives his blessing.) The political leader’s party is in power, and he gives orders in the party, so the political party itself, which forms the government, can’t do anything to or about him. In fact, in most cases the party readily acquiesces in the skullduggery, because the party treasuries, both official and unofficial, get some of the action, if you understand what we mean.
         
Now, a real problem should arise when we, the people at the base of the national pyramid, become angry enough to change the party in power. After the government is changed, the people clamor for the new leaders to investigate and indict the former leaders. The first thing you will hear from the new leaders is that they don’t want to go on any “witch hunt.” After that, they will say they are busy with the business of government. And if the pressure from the people remains too serious, the high priced attorneys swing into action – submissions, injunctions, appeals, etc. If nothing else works, there is always corruption. Funny money is usually enough to pay off officials high and low in the legal machinery. In fact, funny money is more than enough. Funny money rules.
         
After the charade, we, the people, moan and groan and cry and whimper. Our money is gone, and those who were in charge of it cannot be blamed or punished. 175 years after emancipation, 45 years after self-government, and 28 years after independence, we still work to create wealth for other people to enjoy. And above all the honorables and right honorables around us, across the Caribbean Sea and the Atlantic Ocean, “Her Majesty the Queen, her heirs and successors …”
         
Thus endeth today’s lesson.


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